It’s question time! There have been a few concepts bouncing around my head lately. While I know my own perspective, I’d love to get some of my readers’ perspectives on these questions.
For those who are working towards being a healthy weight:
A) Do you worry that too much of your identity is tied up in being overweight?
B) Do you worry about losing “who you are” once the pounds are gone?
C) Have friends/family gone out of their way to sabotage your weight loss efforts? How did you deal with it?
For those of you that are already at goal:
A) Did you worry about losing your identity “as a fat person” once you were no longer overweight?
B) Do you feel like your personality changed when you lost the weight?
C) Did friends/family ever go out of their way to sabotage your weight loss efforts? How did you deal with it?
Personally I don’t worry about “losing my identity” when I’ve lost my weight. Who I am is who I am, fat, thin or in between. What I am concerned about is dealing with people around me who might feel threatened or even angry at the changes I’ll go through. I’ve had people (usually close family members) go out of their way to sabotage my previous weight loss efforts. I find that harder to deal with than people being out and out rude about my weight. Mostly because there’s this unspoken belief that family are supposed to want to support you when you’re trying to better yourself. When they do the exact opposite, it can be challenging to deal with. However, I am able to recognize that the people who tried sabotaging me previously have weight issues themselves and were acting out their own feelings of anger and helplessness. They felt that anger because they believed they could never do what I am doing. (Does that make sense?)
I know that right now a lot of my identity is tied up in my weight. I also know that once the weight is gone, that focus on my being overweight will be gone and my self image will learn to re-identify as a regular to thin person. So I’m not terribly worried that right now my identity is so closely tied to being fat. I’m pretty confident that my self-image will “right itself” once I’m no longer fat.