Thin In The Wrong Way

I’ve always had thin, baby-fine hair. It was adorable when I was little, but as I got older…not so much. One of the running family jokes is, “Talk about genetic betrayal – thin hair and a thick waist!”.

There’s only so much you can do with super fine hair.  For years and years my mom wanted me to grow my hair long…almost sideshow freak long. From ages 7 through 16, my hair went past my butt. I got sick of this mighty fast, but didn’t have the guts to do anything about it until I was 16. Egged on by some friends, I went downtown and got my hair cut in a short, severe bob with unfortunate layers. Layers when you have thick hair isn’t necessarily a bad thing…layers when your hair is too fine to hold even the smallest amount of product is a hair disaster. The first time I washed and dried it after the cut, I was devastated. I looked like I was wearing one of those tinsel wigs they sell at party supply stores for $1.00. The worst part about it, though, was that I was grounded for 2 months.

Currently my hair is about 3 inches past my shoulders. It’s looking much thinner and sparser of late, owing in part to some stressful stuff that’s been going on for longer than I’d care to deal with. Unlike some of my friends, when I get stressed it isn’t my ass that starts getting thinner and thinner – it’s my hair. *sigh*

I’ve been trying to find some hair style options that might suit me right now. Just once, I would love and adore to cut it all off in a pixie style cut, but right now my face is too fat to even consider trying that out. Growing my hair out right now when it’s in poor condition isn’t a viable option, either. The longer it gets, the sadder and thinner it looks. Cutting a couple of inches off here and there every 8 weeks or so isn’t really (pardon the pun) cutting it anymore. I’d love to find a short (above the shoulders) style that won’t make my face look even fatter than it already is, but I fear that’s next to impossible.

Is it possible for a now-fat-but-soon-to-be-thinner gal find a haircut that looks impossibly polished, is easy to style (read: little to no styling required) and won’t make her face look even fatter than it already is?  I’d love to find a hairstyle that met all these requirements, and soon. I don’t want to have to resort to wearing a tinsel wig in public.


7 thoughts on “Thin In The Wrong Way

  1. Do you color your hair? Sometimes that tends to make the hair shaft thicker. I am not a hairdresser though and I would guess you’ve thought of everything. It won’t be forever. Hang in there.

    • Hi Lynn, yes, I used to color my hair but haven’t now for about four years. I am thinking about going back to getting it colored regularly, it’s just deciding on what color! Thanks for commenting. 🙂

  2. I had long hair my entire life until May of 2011 when I became inspired and had it cut into a pixie. Everywhere I go, I receive compliments and comments by women (and women only) that they love my hair and wish they could wear it short like mine. I also work with a woman who is heavy and every time she sees me she says she is going to cut her hair into a pixie as soon as she loses all of her weight. I say, why wait? Cut it off now. What difference does it make.? I have seen plenty of women with full faces who can rock a short haircut. I don’t agree with the thinking that you have to be thin to sport a pixie. I think you should be whoever you want to be. Live for the now, live in the moment, not for some foreseeable future.

    In 2010, I underwent 2 major surgeries and nearly died. I also lost my brother that same year. I stood at his grave 8 weeks post op from Surgery #1 and 4 days post-op from Surgery #2. Had I known my body was going to betray me, I would have appreciated what I had before these surgeries. Had I known I was going to lose my brother, I would have appreciated the time we had together. None of us knows how much time we have. Living for some future that may or may not arrive is a bad idea. You should cherish the now. Live in the now and DO WHAT YOU WANT NOW! We as humans always assume we have lots of time. Guess what? We don’t. My brother died at age 51 and left behind 3 kids. I nearly died too and when I think about all the stupid shit I stressed about, I literally cringe.

    Now I enjoy the moment and have stopped waiting for the future to arrive, the future is now. Do I wish I was thinner? Sure. We all do. But know this: My entire life I always thought I was fat, when in reality, I wasn’t. When I weighed 120 lbs I thought I was fat. When I weighed 130 lbs on my wedding day, I thought I was fat. When I look back at pictures of myself and see how thin I really was, I shake my head in disgust because I wasn’t fat – I never was. Now at 45 years of age, and those 2 major surgeries later (3 if you count the one I had in 2004), I would kill to weight 120 or 135 lbs. My current weight is 150 lbs. Am I happy about the number? No. But as my past behavior has proven, I’ve never been happy with any number on the scale. Even when I weighed 117 lbs. The # on the scale is never what I want, so I stopped stepping on the scale. Now I go by my clothes and how I feel. I am a vegan. I walk every single day and I run, plus I dance ballet 1 day a week. All this healthy eating and exercising and my weight will not budge past 150 lbs and my attitude is: so be it. I’m not going to start living my life when the scale reads a particular # and you shouldn’t either.

    Just sayin’ 🙂


    • I’m so sorry about your brother. I lost my brother, too, albeit at a much earlier age. I know just how hard it can be. Living in the now is definitely a motto to live by. Thanks so much for sharing. All the best to you, too.

      • All the best to you as well. I hope you’ll consider the pixie cut irrespective of your weight. Don’t be so hard on yourself. If you only knew what I went through health-wise, you would feel the way I do and appreciate what you have.

        I’m also sorry to hear you lost your brother. It really puts things into perspective, doesn’t it?

        On another note: One thing that helped me slim down after gaining weight from 2 surgeries (in 2010) was becoming a vegan. That was my new year’s resolution Jan 1, 2011 to become a vegan. After 6 months of living a vegan lifestyle, 15 lbs fell off my body without even trying and yet I was eating huge amounts of food. For me, I truly believe giving up all dairy (as part of being a vegan) was the reason I lost weight. Prior to that, I was a dairy eating vegetarian. I highly recommend the book: The Kind Diet by Alicia Silverstone. The book is a nice intro to vegan living and chronicles her journey of becoming a vegan.


        p.s. I do enjoy your blog — keep the posts coming.

  3. I have the same problem. My yoyo dieting and stress cause my hair to thin, which makes me even more stressed. It’s endless.

  4. There are several things you can do. I have the same problem. If you want a pixi cut, try to get to a wig store and try some on so you’ll see how you look in that look. Fat or not, there are very few people (I think) that can pull off a pixi cut past the age of 13.

    Also, my lifesaver are human hair extensions. I don’t wear them everyday, but they are a lifesaver when I go out.

    I have kept my hair pretty long because 1) it covers up the sparse parts and 2) I like my hair up and off my face and neck.

    All that being said, if you want a pixi cut, go and get it!

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